June 6, 2000 - Nameless
Well Marge, I hardly know where to begin. I wrote to Babaji the other day, my first time. I was intrigued by his reply, but it was not very specific and I found I was still "unimpressed" by what was said. It didn't seem to be very uniquely "my" message so I was still somewhat skeptical as to the identity of the entity answering these emails. I guffawed slightly and thought "yeah, right, well anyone could be out there writing lovely prose about being positive and loving to people who wrote to them, all in the name of Babaji." But HOW would I KNOW that it REALLY was BABAJI writing the answers?
I waited a couple of days, and kept remembering what you and Babaji have said over and over and over: "Repeat the Mahamantra and invoke (call on) my name and I will be with you." I found that SO hard to believe as literal. I am an experienced "new ager person," occult researcher, registered American Astrologer, Teacher of Meditation and of the Tarot. Ran the Branch of a very famous American Astrology organization for years, graduate of Silva Mind Control and experienced medium for 30 years. In other words, I am no stranger to the idea of contact from entities that may not be "incarnate" at this time.
My father and I studied Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda when I was just 6 years old and Dad taught Metaphysics at a very large university.
I have gone through a lot of hardship financially and emotionally and healthwise for the past 20 years. I thought it was relentless until I experienced the last 3 months. For 90 days I have had one disaster after another NONSTOP relentlessly. Some days there were 2 or 3 things. The culmination was the breakup of my 30 year "perfect" marriage. I have been devastated.
I asked in a meditation one day that "I meet anyone that I have past karma with whoever is incarnate now while I am too, and that I make peace with and finish as much karma as I can NOW.
I met 18 people who all recognized me as I recognized them too. It was so eerie. A long procession of folks popped up... And, they all came through one particular site that I kept visiting, a spiritual chat room, here on the Internet.
On top of all the challenges in this, my former husband, newly separated from me had gone on his very first "date" last night. He had messed up our lives badly, and had no illusions about the need for me to leave him. He understood and even said he was grateful that I had taken so long to "wake up" to the need to dissolve the marriage he had ruined. He didn't blame me, and loved me dearly. We agreed to remain friends for life. He was terribly hurt at his loss though. So he went on his date. I had a strangely poignant but cool feeling about that happening. I was strangely detached.
Well, the upshot was that last night, when I did the Mahamantra as told to, and invoked the name of Babaji, I had scarcely finished the 3rd syllable of the name before I was aware of his voice, soft and strong. It spoke lovingly to me. Told me many things about my situation and how to deal with it. He told me to stop feeling so hurt that everything was over and changing so rapidly. He said:
"Don't you realize how completely your life is being washed and cleaned? All the problems you have had are wiped away in one fell swoop. You are free, and you may begin a whole new positive phase of your life. You will never again go through the things that have gone before. Stop obsessing about the past ... that is why it is the past. Let it be 'past' - you go on - and you always will. Don't you realize that this illusion is being changed for your spiritual health? Relax and let the will of heaven manifest."
Then I quickly acknowledged that I knew who it was. I had no doubt. I apologized for my questioning that it was possible that the person writing the emails REALLY was Babaji. I KNEW it was. He made statements about how I could be perceiving him as I did, as a "voice" and presence all around me but emanating from deep within. He said that he WAS within me. That he wasn't "all in my head" but was really THERE inside me directly. I wondered how. He began to explain something that blew my mind so completely in its unbelievable simplicity and uncanny ring of truth. I became aware that the explanation was long and scientific and so beautiful in it's simplicity. I wanted to be able to remember it, but didn't want to get up to get paper and pencil to write it down because I was afraid I would end the connection by getting up from the bed and moving around. Then the voice led me to go ahead and get the paper. It said, write this...send it to Marge, she may want to share it. So-- here we go:
Me: Baba, how is it that I know you are you (and not me) but I perceive you as inside me?
BABA: I AM inside you. You are aware of me BECAUSE I am inside you. You do not realize the actual nature of reality. You don't realize that from this side I simply raise the timbre/intensity of my vibration to make it strong enough for "EVEN" you humans to pick up my presence... I don't do anything extraordinary in the sense you understand. You all think communication with Me is a "Phenomena" and unusual in some way. It is not. It is quite easy and usual but you have not gotten far enough in your knowledge of the true nature of reality to realize yet what happens with access from one dimension to another. It is much simpler than you know, as most of reality is simpler than you all realize yet. I raise or lower my intensity to a point where I "glow" brightly enough to be "seen" by your dimension as needed.
Me: Oh MY - but Baba, how then do you come here and "appear" fully grown when you come back and forth in different incarnations? How can you just manifest a body, it is FLESH Baba! HOW?
BABA: Easy anxious one. The same way that I raise my vibration to be "heard," I raise it slightly more to be "seen" as flesh. Even your scientists now realize that flesh is not solid, indeed nothing is ... all is vibration ... all is in constant motion ... they realize that the distances between atoms on a minute level are the same as the ones in the heavens between the planets. So dear one, don't you see, flesh is also "see through" and not solid at all! The "bodies " that you each see are not solid at all. You just see them that way."
At this point, Baba said to get up and write what he would say next, assured me I'd remember the first bit, and said he'd wait. I got the paper, and soon realized that he was indeed still there even though I was now up, and sitting with pen poised.
BABA: The important things to remember about reality and how it functions are to remember PURITY and INTENSITY. These are the ingredients for manifestation. There is a point in the equation of the two where a balance is struck. Any certain amount of PURITY (of intention) has a corresponding amount of INTENSITY (strength of intention) at which it becomes so properly balanced that it immediately manifests. Our challenge as humans is to learn those balances and how to use them in helpful and caring ways and not to simply create "things" for our selfish use.
Once again, I was admonished to understand that PURITY of intent was SUCH a large part of the equation. This is a sliding scale he said... these are not "balances" where the ingredients on each side of the equal sign are the same, they are balanced because of the sliding point of balance in each instance of need. The quote ran like this literally:
"The balance point of (between) purity and intensity is the key. This point is not balanced in terms of 'equal' but balanced in terms of 'CALIBRATION'! Different things 'balance' at different points (of an x,y axis for instance). Reality as you know it, visual reality is a matter of YOU (people) 'seeing' because of a balance between your eye and the vibratory rate of a certain thing's own projecting rate (vibratory rate) or electronic pulsing [action]. I can be seen or not as 'real' depending on how strongly I 'push' or project my vibrations in their intensity and how purely I can emote what I desire. And voila! Strongly enough, and EVEN humans can perceive me as one of them. (For your own bodies are no more dense or solid than mine!)
"I can just vary my PITCH at will and you can't yet. (!) remember: KEEP IT SIMPLE KEEP IT TRUE BE ONLY YOU,
"Goodbye. Babaji."
This morning, when my ex came to have me drive him to work so I can get the car, I was determined not to ask about his "date" last night. If he wanted to bring it up, he would, I reasoned. Soon, he did say tentatively that he had gone. He was waiting for a sign from me that I could stand to discuss it. We had agreed to be "bestest friends for life" ... to continue to share openly as we had done in the marriage for so long. I indicated an interest and he went on. He stated that he couldn't understand what had happened, but that he had a fabulous time, that the most incredible coincidences of fate had come up all that evening to show him it was a very special meeting between them and that it was "fated" too ... as he put it "I felt the same strange awareness of rightness that I felt 30 years ago when you and I met."
I was truly FLOORED. it took only 2 seconds of shock to realize that I didn't really feel hurt or slighted at all. What I felt was RELIEF. He was going to heal nicely. He would have a new life. He would be happy. and the new lady would be getting one awesome wonderful guy. We were ALL going to be unbelievably happy. I was stunned. This was hours after BABAJI had come to me to tell me that my "loose ends and problems" were all being taken care of!
Ex-hubby and I hugged when he got out of the car, and said how glad we each were for the beauty of the positive way of living and loving. We were grateful for spiritual partnerships like those spoken of in Gary Zukav's books Seat of the Soul, and the new one "Soul Stories" which I had carried around all through the breakup. There have been a hundred other little hints and occurrences through this whole ordeal that have reassured me all along that this is all part of a larger plan. I am so happy to know spiritual happiness. Physical happiness is never far behind.
WELL Marge, that is it. What do you make of THAT?
I know this has been long. I had to give it as it happened though. The shared experiences of others in the newsletters have helped me through this so much. I mean it. I can't begin to explain how it has kept my mind on track so many many days when I awaken to physical reality each day and say, oh no, I'm awake again, now I have to think about all this bad stuff that is happening ... how can I get through another day? I boot up, see your emails, read the words and somehow I am energized to go through another day. THANK YOU for the work you do. I can't begin to thank you enough. I admonish others to PLEASE HELP !! This is important work!!
And Marge, I have offered before, and I do so again, anything I can do, I will be glad to. I will happily type whatever you need and I can work at it as long as you need. Please let me know.
THANK YOU AGAIN a million times.
OM NAMAH SHIVAYA"