Stop the coaster, I want to get off!
Babaji,
How very right you are regarding the lower self and its desires leading to despair. Yet despite all that you have shown me, I still find the mahamantra being constantly replaced in my mind by habitual thoughts. I still watch my ego being attached to results. I still slip into (well okay, live in) the grand delusion that "I am" my result attached ego (maya). So, I want to use this opportunity to thank you for all the help you have given so far (the yoga, the teachings, the teachers, etc. ) while simultaneously indulging my ungrateful, greedy, despair-wrought ego in its request to once again cry out to you for more help. As I know you know, my personal emotional roller coaster has entered a section where the up-downs, up-downs are getting quicker and harder to take. I guess I'm just looking for assurance that it's alright to get sick and that my fellow passengers will be protected from my mess.
Jai Bhole Baba Ki Jai!!!
Dave
p. s. "it's been a while since we've been this close." Was that really you, or was that my ego?